I could hear you coming with your white hair crackling in the wind. I hope you like the new steps. They make the journey easier for both those who wear no shoes and those who wear Prada.
Here’s a lamp. I usually sit in the dark but I keep a few of them handy because I want to encourage visitors and no one eats gluten anymore. I sense there is something in your hands? Is it candy? It’s totally appropriate to make an offering to me. I’m not saying I’m holy but until mysticism is a union occupation , I’ll take what I can get. Sit anywhere. You may want to borrow one of these palm fronds to keep your garments down as I am doing. It’s very breezy living on a mountain top let alone in this drafty hermitage. Last thing I want is to expose myself to a stranger. Also, I don’t want to catch on fire. But I’m nattering on.
I sense you have come for something important so I will dispense with listening to your voice and just read your mind. Ah, you want to know how to exist in this increasingly stupid world? Also are you pregnant? To the first question I say: Act increasingly stupid yourself, but in a mindful kind of Buddhisty sort of way so that no one can fault you. To the second I say, wait a month and see if you get your period. A final reminder: I’m just another gal trying to eke out a living but I can only take donations or else I have to report it as income. Oooh, full size Reese’s! Come back anytime and do me a favor, tell the next person you see heading up that I absolutely changed your life forever.
Sunday Strange microfiction challenge