If you opened this post you have been infected! What scares you more – a computer virus or flesh eating bacteria? I haven’t been posting lately not because of a computer virus but because of the sort of personal physical stupidity which is reminiscent of Dumb and Dumber. See the results below which are just short of, you guessed it, flesh eating bacteria. The next photo is gross but imagine my dismay when the doctor today squeezed said wound in order to get “pus” for a culture just to make sure my flesh was not being eaten. I almost threw up. Just rejoice it is not your leg.
I like this photo because you get to see the matching pink of my running shoe with the infection as well as the overall chaos of my office. My life is a small disaster with matching accessories. This small disaster started a couple of weeks ago when I began to overdo my life once again hoping for better results. I was rowing 3 times a week in preparation for our 3 mile race in Seward. Meanwhile my boss was retiring and I had a big barbeque on the schedule for her. Most people would be able to pull this off but I always push it one step too far. I was pretty tired leaving work after the party was over and looking forward to an evening off from rowing. I remembered that I hadn’t put the hot grill away so I actually got out of my car and attempted to drag it to the shed. A vindictive trailer hitch jumped out from behind me in our parking lot and threw me onto the attached trailer in order draw attention to my stupidity. I screamed a four letter word extremely loudly which was ignored by all in the nearby apartment building because I suppose it is rather cliche. I could have been more creative but I had that dizzy “I think I broke something” feeling for a minute which distracted me. I did not break something but I did need to fill out a dreaded incident report and go get a tetanus shot.
I proceeded to, with the aid of a small bandage go camping the next day and win a medal with the novice 8 boat at the Tail of the Bear regatta in Seward. I was very excited, ate lots of chili and only got my leg a little wet as it was what we call a wet loading ( we did not use the dock to get in.) I noticed that my leg and ankle were pretty bruised but hey I take antidepressants and they make bruising fun due to their blood thinning properties.
Leg did not begin to really hurt until Tuesday, that’s 5 days after I hurt it and one more lake dip this time in Anchorage because, it was 75 degrees and the wound just looked so much better. By then the bruising was better and yet I felt like cells were dying every time I took a step. I showed up at rowing practice and the tough gals who used to work for the fire department ordered me out of there and back to the doc in the box. They were the ones who first mentioned flesh eating bacteria which I repeat I do not have, at least unless the doctor calls me back and says I do.
I went to the doc in the box for the second time in order to deal with the growing pinkness and slight oozing of my leg only to be told by the very sweet, enthusiastic person who took my blood pressure that it looked like I had flesh eating bacteria. I felt a little sick when she said this but that cleared up when I heard her repeat my stupid story very loudly to the doctor outside the closed door to my examination room. I realized that she was a little wound up and crazy. The doctor was less so. I only felt like vomiting at the aforementioned squeezing part of his exam even though it didn’t hurt. w Enough drama for one day.
Although I had elevated, iced and took ibuprofen the doctor chided me for not following the instruction to keep the wound dry. This is an interesting thinking error on my part which I trace back to my childhood. I grew up by the ocean and always thought it was a good idea to swim with a cut because it would dry it out! Not so with lake water. Dumb and dumber.
I now have my Cephalexin and some prescription antibiotic ointment for good measure. He put a nice Tweety Bird band-aid on me which I removed when I got home for something completely waterproof. I am always a bit self conscious that I have to report my anti-anxiety medications when I go to the doctor. I assume they think that I’m just being hysterical and the Tweety Bird band-aid made me feel like it was all in my head and it was just a tiny boo boo which I suppose it is, but I took it off as soon as I could. Here is what it looks like now. This photo does not do justice to the fact that my ankle bones are nearly invisible with the swelling and there is a nice black shadow under them where all the bruising has seeped as if my foot hasn’t slept for a week.
The lesson here is. I always overdo things. It always catches up with me. My outsides mirror my insides and then I have to show and tell everyone to make them laugh. I’m now on my way to the shower protected by my waterproof band-aid. I knew that rowing could be dangerous. Almost as dangerous as barbequing. I probably should stick to blogging.