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The Adventures of Hat Woman

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Hat Woman, the daring superhero who rescues her own soul and the hats of the world from loneliness and despair.  Hat woman woman lives in a cold world which necessitates the use of head covering for most humans, even indoors and during the summer. Hat woman loves the thrill of the chase whether it be a hat in the wind or a yard sale attendant attempting to close before 3 pm. There was a time, in her youth when she only wore vintage hats but being older than most vintage hats today she eschews them for the more trendy, often metro-sexual variety, which  confuse the public as to her gender and fashion intentions. Hat woman makes fashion mistakes in order to make the world safe for hat adventurers of all kinds. Behold a gallery of  spring/summer/fall hatwear on a sporty theme.

Are we trippin’ or is that hot pink tie dye?


You’re absolutely right, no one should make a menswear style hat in that color but I got in on sale at Nordstrom’s for that very reason.  It’s excellent for meeting people who you’ve never met before in a crowded restaurant. My estranged cousins for example were able to recognize me immediately despite the fact that we all have the same wolf eyes and that might have sufficed.

the most normal hat I own

This lovely grey number comes from The Berkeley Hat Company on Telegraph Ave. They have very fine hats of all sorts and they ship! It’s fun to spend an hour  finding the perfect headgear to walk out with. It was hot and pouring rain when I bought this as an alternative to a hateful umbrella and it did the trick. I once got blood poisoning from an umbrella when I had no health insurance and have avoided them ever since. I hope you like the unobtrusive Star Trek poster on my right. It extolls the glory of flamboyance. I’m surprised that alien isn’t wearing a hat.

one dalla- two looks

Got it at The Goodwill in Glendale, CA. It’s a magic hat. Turn it over and voila…

So hip and Hawaiian

I have a red paisley skirt which goes with the first look but have not found an occasion for this red white and blue theme except for maybe the fourth of July. Remember these aren’t even my costume hats of which I have many more. Here for example is the hat I wore on the 4th of July this year.

I like being tall

The next hat is the only thing I could wear to The Royal Wedding. I wore it to a party where we watched the wedding and I got high on black tea of which I drank 5 cups never having drank more than one before. It’s a simple hat, I can stick  accoutrements of many types  in the brim to make it thematic – daggers, windshield wipers, political posters, lollipops, tea bags, whatever.

A blank canvas for hat art


This next hat is from The Bunnell Street Arts Center in Homer. It was made by Leza Saks,( at least that’s what her name looks like. She wrote her name in marker on the tag about 8 years ago. It’s one of my absolute favorites as it looks like the grass from an Easter basket growing on my head.

A hip-hop as in Easter Bunny type hat from Homer

The next three are fall hats, that’s August for Alaskans.  The first was bought at a rummage sale for some charity. It was lying in a  box of hodge-podge  in a dark warehouse . For some reason there was a black flower stuck on the front but the flower was bent out of shape and I couldn’t unbend it. Turns out it was just a lump of cat poo. Thus this became The Poo hat.

Smells delicious!


The next hat was meant for someone quite younger, perhaps a person who enjoys Justin Bieber. Not that I don’t enjoy Justin Bieber but I would never admit it as it make me appear twisted and sick.  But the hat is sporty and silly so I will continue to wear it no matter if Justin Bieber breaks my heart or not.


Pink plaid is for old ladies too

Note that in every photo I’m wearing a jacket. It’s July and I’m indoors. I’m freezing. I live in Alaska. I’m absolutely crazy, but then I do have an excuse to buy hats. The following hat I bought today. I was taking it easy because I’m still rowing the 4 person shell like a dory and my back started to spasm. I bought some chocolate and went to The Nordstrom’s  Anniversary Sale. I got a pair of boots and running shoes in size 12 shoes and also a hat. The hat is acrylic and was $26.00 which makes up for all the money I saved on the discounted footwear. I can’t wait until it gets a little colder so I can wear it. That’s not something people say out loud in Alaska.

Praying for frost!

I am sadly aware that Anchorage is one of the worst dressed cities in the USA but I’m trying to change it, one hat at a time. Hat Woman to the rescue!  In 2013 I’m working towards next to the last.






About polarflares

My head is so big because it has so many holes and air gets in.

One response »

  1. thanks for the morning smile


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